The Oscars 2014
On February 19th, we had a taste of Spring with temperatures reaching 45 degrees in Geneva. People were out jogging, birds were chirping, and I’m pretty sure that I saw someone sun tanning in the snow. Today, the thermometer’s mercury reads “C-O-L-D” and as Chicagoans, what do we have left? Oh yeah, we can watch bronzed-Californians walk the red carpet in 80-degree weather while the losers of the Academy Awards receive $80,000 goody-bags. I repeat, THE LOSERS RECEIVE $80,000 GOODY-BAGS.
Now that my jealousy has been established, I have to admit that movies didn’t always make me crabby. When it was November and December, and I was all “ISN’T THE SNOW BEAUTIFUL?” and “I FEEL SO FESTIVE, LET’S GO SEE AMERICAN HUSTLE!” but now, I’m just bitter and it if it wasn’t for my new yoga mat, I’d probably try to induce hibernation.
So, winter-depression aside, I asked around the office if anyone had favorites they were hoping to win and these are some of the answers I received:
Best Picture: “The Wolf Of Wall Street”
Certainly not a movie to take the kids to see, WOW is exactly that. “It’s like a rap music video before being edited to be shown on MTV.” Leonardo’s character is crazy and addicting, like a train-wreck you’re excited to see de-rail.
Best Actor: Christian Bale in “American Hustle”
“Since when did Batman’s super powers involve the ability to gain 40 lbs? Or grow a creepy comb-over?” He excels at both, apparently, and with the best 70s hits playing in the background, is it even worth mentioning how awesome he is at portraying a slightly pathetic, slightly sweet con-artist?
Best Actress In A Supporting Role: Julia Roberts in “Osage County”
No one in the office saw this, but my Nana saw it with her lady friends and she said, “Julia was just perfect.”
Best Animated Feature Film
I don’t care if you’re name is Mr. Pixar, we all agree that anything by Hayao Miyazaki should trump all animations. “Spirited Away? My Neighbor Totoro? This is the type of animation that children should grow up with.”
If you do watch the Academy Awards, I hope it is from under your snuggie. Stay warm & always remember, at least we don’t have earthquakes.